not home yet

I was raised as a military brat. Moving was a way of life for me. I never had a choice in where or when we moved. Just to give a sampling, here is the run down of schools I attended through those awkward and transitional years. Nice.

6th grade Orange Hunt
7th Washington Irving
First half of 8th grade Mary Help of Christians
Second Half of 8th grade St.Lukes
9th Carroll HS
10th Dayton Christian HS
11th-12th West Springfield HS

Moving was never easy. I have distinct memories of pulling out of many a driveway and watching the road narrow behind us. This is because I was usually seated in the rear facing pop up seat of our Volvo station wagon.



Thankfully, the Lord pre-wired me for cheerleading, choir and musical theatre. This made it easier to make friends quickly (summer try-outs) and have a diverse group of friends (choir dorks to popular crowd). All things to all people, anywhere.

So, naturally, God had church planting in mind for my future, along with my marrying another military brat.

HERE WE GO!

We showed this video at Portico on Sunday. Though I helped Mark shoot the video footage, I did not want to see any of the final video until Sunday. Something about the reality of it all was just too much for pregnant girl to take in. Our response from the church was phenomenol. No one was too, too happy that we were leaving. Thank you, Jesus. Everyone was excited to see that God is moving, working, and sending.

On my drive home from church I felt very emotional. Hungry, hormonal and heaven bound lends to a melt-down. I walked through the door, sat on my kitchen counter, and ate some Texas Sheet Cake right out of the pan with my fork. Through tears I felt like the Lord spoke to my heart. I was surprised at how gentle He was with me. I didn't sense one bit of conviction over feeling sad about this move. Did you catch that couched confession? This is what I sensed Him say.

Jaime, the dissonance you feel, the resistance you feel, the longing for a home you feel is not sinful disobedience or unwillingness. It is heaven written on your heart. You were not, in fact, made to move. You were made to come home forever. Moving and leaving is not the plan forever, Jaime. I know this is hard. I know that it hurts. I know that you want to sink your roots down deep and settle in. I know you want to not only plant, but also to nurture, water, and watch life grow. You will... May the bristle you feel remind you that you were never meant for an endless sojourn. You were made for heaven. You will, in fact, one day, come home FOR GOOD. SO, right now, move along... Press through... Pour it out... This isn't forever...Loose your life here...so that you can find it in me.

You see how gentle He was? It's not like He is calling us to Calcutta, for heaven's sake! I am seriously the most pathetic missionary ever. May God grant us the grace we need to make it to NOVA next spring, and all we need to make it safely home one day.

Hebrews 11

8By faith Abraham, when called to go to a place he would later receive as his inheritance, obeyed and went, even though he did not know where he was going. 9By faith he made his home in the promised land like a stranger in a foreign country; he lived in tents, as did Isaac and Jacob, who were heirs with him of the same promise. 10For he was looking forward to the city with foundations, whose architect and builder is God.

11By faith Abraham, even though he was past age—and Sarah herself was barren—was enabled to become a father because he[a]considered him faithful who had made the promise. 12And so from this one man, and he as good as dead, came descendants as numerous as the stars in the sky and as countless as the sand on the seashore.

13All these people were still living by faith when they died. They did not receive the things promised; they only saw them and welcomed them from a distance. And they admitted that they were aliens and strangers on earth. 14People who say such things show that they are looking for a country of their own. 15If they had been thinking of the country they had left, they would have had opportunity to return. 16Instead, they were longing for a better country—a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared a city for them.

32And what more shall I say? I do not have time to tell about Gideon, Barak, Samson, Jephthah, David, Samuel and the prophets, 33who through faith conquered kingdoms, administered justice, and gained what was promised; who shut the mouths of lions, 34quenched the fury of the flames, and escaped the edge of the sword; whose weakness was turned to strength; and who became powerful in battle and routed foreign armies. 35Women received back their dead, raised to life again. Others were tortured and refused to be released, so that they might gain a better resurrection. 36Some faced jeers and flogging, while still others were chained and put in prison. 37They were stoned[f]; they were sawed in two; they were put to death by the sword. They went about in sheepskins and goatskins, destitute, persecuted and mistreated— 38the world was not worthy of them. They wandered in deserts and mountains, and in caves and holes in the ground.

39These were all commended for their faith, yet none of them received what had been promised. 40God had planned something better for us so that only together with us would they be made perfect.